Hi darlings! Have you ever been in that situation where it felt like your confidence had been thrown in the mud? Have you ever at any point in time felt that the ground should just swallow you up? (it's not a weird feeling) How about that moment you were to speak to a good number of people and during /after speaking, you wished you didn't speak at all? Like all you said didn't make any particular sense to you.
Gosh! Those moments or events are not ones you want to have a replay of.
Sometimes, we wonder what goes wrong with our Self-confidence. Some people even think confidence does live in them at all… Well, the truth is that most times the confidence is there, but we have to “rock it “.
Imagine someone asks you why you don't put on a particular outfit, let's say Denim jacket , and you tell the person you actually have Denim jackets hanging in your closet! The truth is you do have a Denim outfit, but you've decided not to wear it for reasons you know of.
The same applies to Self-Confidence!
We have the confidence most of the time but we sometimes don't know how to “rock it”, we don't show display how much confidence we have in ourselves.
I write this moment not to teach on how to build your self-confidence, but how to maintain and “rock” the best outfit - Self-Confidence.
- SELF-DISCOVERY: How well do you know yourself? How much of yourself do you know? Most of us have heard about this 5 minutes pitch thing; a concept that helps you build your confidence and all. It asks a question: What's the first thing you will do when you run into a famous person?, someone like Barack Obama, the former President of The United States of America. You might want to talk about who you are and what you do, but how well can you describe yourself? There's so much to knowing yourself, it builds your confidence. Take time out to discover who you are, you can even take a step and write some amazing things about yourself! Come on, nobody can know you like you! Get in on the path of discovery and we can move from there!
- SELF-VALIDATION : A person who appreciates himself or herself doesn't need validation from other people! Yes, other people's opinions matter at some point but their opinion shouldn't be your validation! As long as you look for other people to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are in for it! Learn not to hinge your life on the opinions of people! Believe in you for you! Once you start seeking for people's validation, you begin to live your life to please them. Be whole and complete in yourself! No one can give you that.
- AVOID COMPARISON : We do too much of comparison with our folks, friends, colleagues, relatives. You are unique in your own way, you really don't know what those people you compare yourself to are passing through. For the female folks, you saw a friend of yours on a nice pair of heels and you just absolutely loved them, you really want to get the shoes but your purse isn't smiling at you😑😑😑
Depression begins to set in, comparison sets in, your confidence dies. The truth is you don't even know how your friend came about those shoes, you have no idea if she borrowed the shoes for that occasion.
So, learn not to compare yourself to other people, we all are different.
- BEAT YOUR FEARS: FEAR has been interpreted to be : False Evidence Appearing Real. Fear has a way of drawing us back, it kills self-confidence. We all have our fears at some point in time, but what makes the difference between us is that the champions face and beat their fears, and the losers are overwhelmed by the fears.
To exhibit self-confidence, we need to learn to beat our fears.
- SELF- CONTENTMENT : This is a virtue we all should exhibit in our daily lives. Contentment is satisfaction or happiness you derive from situations. Contentment with ourselves and with what we have doesn't make us depend on people's approval.
We should learn to be satisfied with what we have at every point in time because the human needs are insatiable. There's no point you get to and you feel like you have it all, there are always needs and wants arising, so why not bask in the Joy of what you have now, taking a step at a time to meet your needs .
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